COMPLIANT LOVE ORIGINATING FROM GRATIFYING LOVE
The good ground which received the seed gives a hundredfold in due season (Lk 8:8). Similarly the heart which is taken up by delight in God cannot prevent itself from giving reciprocally to God another delight. There is no one who is pleasing to us whom we do not desire to please. Fresh wine cools for sometime those who drink it. But as soon as the wine is warmed by the stomach in which it enters, it warms the stomach reciprocally. The more the stomach warms the wine, the more the heat the wine gives it. Genuine love is never ungrateful. It tries to please those in whom it delights. From this comes the conformity of the lovers which makes us such as we love. The most devout and the most wise king Solomon became idolatrous and foolish when he loved idolatrous and foolish women. He had as many idols as his women had (1Kings 11: 4-8). For that reason Scripture calls effeminate the men who madly love women for their sex. Thus love changes men into women as regards manners and moods.
Now this change takes place unconsciously through delight. Once delight enters our hearts, it produces another delight to give to the one from whom we received it. It is said that in the Far East, there is a little land animal which is extremely pleased with the fishes and the sea. By often swimming with them, finally it becomes a fish. From a land animal it becomes fully a sea animal. Similarly, by delighting in God we become like God. Our will transforms itself into that of the divine majesty by the delight which it takes in the divine will. Love, said St. Chrysostom, either finds similarity or makes its resemblance. For example, those whom we love have a gentle, unnoticeable influence and authority over us. It is necessary either to quit them or imitate them.
He who is attracted by the sweetness of the perfumes enters the shop of a perfumer. In receiving the pleasure which he takes in smelling these scents he perfumes himself. On going out from there he shares with others the pleasure he received. He spreads among them the fragrance of the perfumes which clings to him. With the delight which our heart takes in the thing loved, it draws into itself the qualities of the object loved. For delight opens the heart wide just as sorrow shuts it. Thus Sacred Scripture often uses the word “dilate"[1] instead of rejoice.
The heart is wide open due to pleasure. The characteristics of the qualities which cause pleasure[2] enter into our heart. With them other impressions of the same object, even though displeasing to us, do not cease to enter into us amid the crowd of pleasures. It is like the one who entered the banquet hall without the wedding garment along with those who were properly dressed (Mt 22:11). Thus the disciples of Aristotle were happy to stammer like him and those of Plato walked with their shoulders bent back, imitating him. Plutarch narrates a similar incident about a woman. Her vivid imagination and perception were open to all things by pleasure. So seeing the picture of a black man she conceived a child fully black from a father fully white. The fact of the sheep of Jacob serves as a proof of it (Gen 30:3742). In short, the pleasure we take in a thing is a kind of precursor that imprints in the loving heart the characteristics of the thing which delights it. Thus sacred delight transforms us into God whom we love. The greater the intensity of the delight the more perfect is the transformation. So the saints who loved very much were very soon and perfectly transformed. Love carries over and transmits the manners and moods of one heart to another.
It is strange but true. Suppose there are two identically tuned lutes, that is of the same sound and chord placed one close to the other. If we play one of them, the other, though we do not touch it, will not cease to vibrate as the one we play. The harmony of the one with the other, as if by a natural love, creates this correspondence. We have an aversion to imitate those whom we hate even in things which are good. The Lacedemonians did not want to follow the good counsel given by a wicked person unless it was repeated by a good man. On the contrary, we cannot prevent ourselves from becoming like what we love. The great Apostle [St. Paul] said, I feel that it is in this sense, that the law is laid down not for the innocent (1 Tim 1:9). In fact the innocent is innocent only because of holy love. If one has love it is not necessary to urge him or her by the rigour of the law. It is because love is the most powerful teacher and motivator. Love persuades the heart which it possesses to obey the will and intentions of the beloved. Love is a judge which exercises its power without fuss, without Police or Sergeant at arms. It happens through mutual delight. As we are pleased with God, we in turn desire to please him.
Love is the epitome of all theology. It renders the ignorance of Pauls, of Anthonies, of Hilarys, of Simeons and Francises learned in a most holy manner without books, without teachers, without art. By virtue of this love, the beloved spouse can say with confidence. My Beloved is entirely mine by the delight with which he pleases me and nourishes me. And me, I am entirely his by the benevolent love by which I please him, feed him. My heart nourishes itself by delighting in him. His heart is fed from the joy I take in him for his sake. Thus like a holy shepherd he feeds me like his dear sheep among the lilies (Song 2:16; 6:2) of his perfections in which I am delighted. As for me, his dear sheep, I feed him with the milk of my affections by which I want to please him. Whoever is really pleased with God desires to please God faithfully. In order to please him, we grow in his likeness.
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[1] dilate means to become or make something larger or wider or more open.
[2] Litereally, on which pleasure depends