PENANCE WITHOUT LOVE IS IMPERFECT
All these motives are taught by faith and Christian religion. Hence the repentance which proceeds from them is most praiseworthy though imperfect. It is really commendable since neither Sacred Scripture nor the church would encourage us by such motives, if the repentance which issues from them were not good. We see clearly that it is quite reasonable to repent of our sins due to these reflections. It is even impossible for one who reflects on them attentively not to repent. Surely, this is an imperfect penance because still divine love does not enter therein. Well, do you not see, Theotimus, that all these repentances are made for the sake of our soul, of its happiness, its interior beauty, its honour, its dignity? In one word, it is for love of self — a love, all the same, legitimate, just and well-ordered.
Be aware of this. I do not say that these kinds of repentances reject the love of God. I am only saying that they do not include it. They do not repel it but they do not contain it. They are not opposed to it but they are still without it. It is not kept out but it is not taken in. The will which simply embraces the good is very good. If it embraces the good rejecting what is better, then it is indeed disordered not in accepting one but in rejecting the other. Likewise, the vow to give alms today is good. However, the vow to give it only today is bad. It excludes what is better. The vow to give it today, tomorrow and always when one can do so is better. To repent of one’s sins to avoid the punishment of hell, to gain heaven is well done. It cannot be denied. To take a decision never to repent for any other reason willingly excludes what is better, that is, to repent for love of God. If one does so, he would commit a grave sin. Is there any father who would not take it badly if his son were willing to serve him but never with love and for love of him?
The beginning of good things is good. Progress is better and the completion is very good. The beginning is always good in its quality as progress. However, to finish the work at the beginning or during progress is to upset order. Infancy is good. If one desires to remain a child for ever, it is bad. For a child of hundred years (Is 65:20) is despised. To begin to learn is very praiseworthy. But he who would begin with the intention of never perfecting it would go against all reason. Fear and other motives of which we have spoken are good for the beginning of Christian wisdom which consists in penance. Love is the perfection of penance. God has destined everything for his love as the end of all things. Hence he who would deliberately refuse to reach love would gravely offend God.
The repentance which excludes the love of God is hellish like that of the damned. The repentance which does not reject the love of God, though without it, is good and desireable but imperfect. It cannot give us salvation till it has gained love and has mingled itself with love. So also, the great Apostle said: If I give away all my possessions, and if I hand over my body to be burned but do not have love, I gain nothing (1 Cor 13:3). We too may truly say this: our penance is extremely great. Its sorrow makes our eyes melt in tears. It makes our heart break with regret. But if we do not have the holy love of God, all these would be useless for eternal life.